Both got the same score … how? Part 2

In another blow to the wine industry is the nonsense of scores based on nothing other than the taste. Yes, that’s what I wrote, based on taste.

Before you start let me explain. Wine is all about taste, however there are a number of fundamental points to a wine, so let me name just a few: type; region; variety; age; price point; heritage.

Of the most important is price. Why price? Simple, it’s the single most determining factor when someone purchases a bottle. Try as hard as you like to argue this point, you know it’s true. There are those who are just snobs and won’t spend under x amount because they think it will be rubbish, and of course there is the high end who are buying wine that comes AT a price, not at a price. So the price determines which bottle goes home to dinner than night.

So, and to the biggest question on most peoples lips – which has never been answered honestly – is how can a $100 bottle of wine (or a $1000 bottle) get a score of 95 and a $18 bottle can get the same score.

Let’s not confuse types and varieties and age just yet. A straight and this is hypothetical, shot-out between let’s say two Barossa 08 Shiraz’s. Let’s establish the ground rules:

1. Both are in the same region (demographically)

2. Both had the same conditions – wind, rain, sun, storms, fire, etc. I will accept that one could have been a little more prone to, say wind, or on more of a slope yet this is argument for the sake of argument.

3. Both are well known wineries with, equally good wine makers who have been established for some time and have a history of producing good wine.

4. Both make the same type of wine, that is: a Shiraz

Now there are other considerations yet these are some of the basics. The grape is picked, and the wine – the end result – is made pretty much the same way, apart from (of course) the wine makers little bag of tricks to make his/her wine.

The bottle is packaged and off it goes to all the obligatory wine shows and door-steps of those in the business to get the final ingredient: a score, a ranking, a bit of text for publication, the medals to stick all over the bottle – these are important after all, and depending on what is said it can mean the difference between selling out in a month, or being lucky to sell a case or two.

So, you walk into your local wine shop and there are two bottles of wine. A well respected wine critic has given his seal of approval to both drops with a (in the wine makers mind) richly rewarded 95 points!

Now one is price at $18 and the other is $180. Remember both are a Shiraz, from the same region, same age, same score etc., and you ask yourself “how, what, umm, I don’t understand”.

You, the buyer are no more confused than the ‘respected’ critic who gave a score of 95 to both wines. This sort of score cannot possibly convey any information to you (the buyer) that could be deemed useful. The only thing you can take from this is, the wine – both – must be good. That’s it! Yet you have no idea as to the wines potential (cellaring), its characteristic’s, volume (how much is made) or what makes one worth $162 more than the other.

This is bullshit. There is no other way to look at it. The points system doesn’t allow for any movement in the wine and what it is. What I mean by this is that some wines need to be taken in context. Now, not all wine prices are known when tasted and scored, yet this is an acceptation not a rule, so we can discount this argument. Wines are generally tasted against its peers, so we can discount this argument – that wine tasting is done in a vacuum and is only rated on the merits of the wine at the time. Wines are generally known when tasted, so we can discount this argument, that wines are all blind tasted and there is no idea as to the history or potential of a particular wine.

So, and while it would be a nightmare to administer and more so to use when purchasing wine, there should be a significantly better mechanism for judging wine by scores, and making that score fit a relevant and MEANINGFUL description to those who purchase that wine. While there is this difficultly there cannot possibly be any serious argument that the current scoring is better than nothing, as it actually provides nothing of any use to anyone, other than giving the winery and some marketing groups the impetus to try and sell their wine based on some sort of arbitrary mickey mouse scoring system: “roll-up, roll-up, come buy my wine it got 97 from Mr X”, whereas in fact it should read: “roll-up, roll-up, buy my wine if you like, it got 97 yet so did 15 other wines ranging from $20 cheaper than mine to $450 dearer”.

I can think of a number of ways to make this fairer – that is, to wineries, yet some won’t agree and those who buy wine – yet I won’t bore you with how this could be done, it’s more a case of you thinking a little harder next time you say you brought a 97 scored bottle of wine for $250, because guess what, so did I and mine was only $20.

Restaurant Review - Urbane, Brisbane

Urbane Restaurant
181 Mary Street, Brisbane
http://www.urbanerestaurant.com.au/
07 3229 2271
Chef: Kym Machin

Now to the important bit, the scores. All out of 5.

Overall - 4. Outstanding.

Food - 4                                                Service - 3
Location - 4                                           Price - 4
Wine List - 4                                         Access - 3*
Comfort - 4                                           Cleanliness - 5

*Access to the restaurant is extremely good, however access to the toilets - should you have difficulty, is not good at all.

Menu - Degustation or A la carte
Open – Lunch Friday Only. Dinner Tuesday to Saturday. Close Sunday & Monday & PH's.
Price - A la carte: 3 course $95 (ex. drinks). Degustation: 7 course $85, 12 course $140. There is a vegetarian degustation (either as a 7 ($80) or 12 ($130) course)
Dress - Smart/Smart Casual
Type - New, creative, fresh, innovative, no formal food here

Where do I start and what do I say? This is not a case of if you don't have something nice to say then don't say anything, it’s more a case of feeling conflicted with my thoughts and where I should aim my comments.

On the one hand I could simply make the comment: "Urbane is a wonderful place to eat so go", and leave it at that, and then I could expand more yet I fear much of that would focus on what I think is wrong.

And please, this is not wrong as in 'you did something wrong' yet more in the way of some basic - restaurant - flaws and a menu (degustation) that tappers off rather than doesn't work.

So, where to start and what to say? As most people have the attention span of 10 secs I will say most the good things now, then they will stop reading and I won’t need to worry about too many people feeling like I am being overly critical.

Appearance, how to describe Urbane? Upstairs is elegant and mirrors what you expect from say a 'fine dining' establishment and downstairs is more 'studyish', 'bookish', 'English club' feel. Yes, I know most of these words can't be found in the dictionary, yet poetic licence dictates. You see, downstairs is dark and moody and dare I say, it has a slight sexy feel to it. Stone walls, lots of wood panels which look aged yet have a tactile look about them, and of course a lovely looking wine cellar from which you can go and have a look - a little like choosing a lobster from the tank.

I don't really know what Urbane's booking list is like yet judging by the 'crowd' - that is, it was full - the night we went I wouldn't leave going to Urbane by chance and hope you might get a table at the last minute, yet hey, give it a try!

Don't take this to mean Urbane is popular, which it is, yet there is a very small number of tables. While I didn't count, I don't think there could have been more than 12 to 14 tables upstairs?

One little tip, many people won’t know there is a downstairs - whoops, given away the little secret now - where there are a couple, and I mean only a couple of tables, so if you want a little more privacy, a little more 'mood' setting and want to be tucked away then make sure to ask for a table downstairs. I should add that this is an area that is more suited to big groups yet I know you can have a table should there not be any bookings that night, well if you ask politely and smile.

However, and I guess this is a big however for some, if you have a disability of any kind which makes getting up and down stairs difficult, or impossible, then a table downstairs might not be the best idea, however you will face this dilemma when you need the toilet.

Now, there could be a hidden lift somewhere - god knows where they could have put it - which could ferry you up and down, yet I think this is somewhat unlikely. Speaking of toilets, these are nice. Big, clean and have a feeling of not just being slotted in as a last thought. The basins are big, you could swing 2 cats around in here, and as many restaurants are doing, there are proper cloth towels to wipe your hands on and put in the basket. Sure not the most environmentally friendly idea yet hey, I don't care, it’s nice not to have to pull out the course recycled paper strips from the ugly silver box on the wall, well I do have such delicate little hands after all, mmm.

The location is a good one, and as the night progresses and you have a window by the front you can watch the slowly increasingly shyness (due to alcohol consumption) seep away from some in the street as they start to visit one of the more "interesting" establishments in Mary Street. No need to give that a plug, if that suits your style you will find it, or know about it already.

Right next door is the Euro, stop by there for a drink first (food review coming soon), yet a piece of advice, and only because it’s a nice feeling to feel special - even though your not - go and take your table in the restaurant and then let them know you might like a drink next door and you can 'pass' through the hidden passage way between Urbane and The Euro. Silly? Yep, yet hey it’s all in the name of fun.

Moving on. Food? The food is great, its clean, fresh, and some great ideas are going on in the head of Head Chef - does that make sense? However, and this is one of two criticisms I have about the food, the first: for the obvious ability and skill of Chef and her kitchen the boat is firmly anchored close to the shore. Poor analogy yes, yet you get the point. There is a lot talent here and it’s a shame that so many of the plates seem to be 'playing it safe'. Maybe Brisbane - and I know, sadly it isn’t - isn’t ready for wild and rollercoaster rides when it comes to food, yet the food here appears to be stuck between the two. On the one side its new and inventive and some clever ideas, and on the other it's safe and paired back from being truly outrageous (in a good way) and creative.

I want to add that the presentation is stunning. I like my food dressed and tarted up to look amazing and this does. All the usual swirls and brush strokes and droplets of sauce are here, yet it works and it looks good. Sometimes it’s a little wanky and pretentious, yet not here, this is on the money.

My other criticism, and I will get it out the way now with the food was the dessert, or should I say desserts. Now, if I recall correctly there were 3 dessert courses as part of the 12 course degustation. Thank god I have some anonymity as Chef or the kitchen may knife me for this, yet the desserts are bland and boring.

Whoops, it’s been said now. The other courses were delicious, and each flowed well after each other, and as I have mentioned they were all clean and crisp and fresh and kept your interest. Then comes the desserts, while they were nice they just didn’t wow me, or our table. It seemed as though the creativity and dare I say interest stopped at dessert. Maybe our expectations where to high – I don’t think so - yet while you could see the thought process and the reasoning behind the desserts they just didn’t work in so much as delivering what could have been an absolutely outstanding menu.

Moving on. Drinks? Great! Not much else to say other than great. As usual and this is all too typical of anywhere is the whiskey (Scotch) list was poor. The usual suspects lined up and were politely passed on. Really, what is wrong with a restaurant buying some very well aged (and expensive) whiskeys for their clientele? Enough said as this is a real pet hate of mine.

A good selection of cocktails – The Euro that is – and the wine list is extensive and quite a good number by the glass. My only comment about the wine list is that while extensive and on the whole well planned there does seem to be a few to many wines added for the sake of it. The list is not overly complicated, yet some of these could be binned – literally, and replaced with a much better selection making this a very through and well thought-out wine list.

A BIG however is that some of the prices are just simply, get ready a naughty word is coming: taking the piss. Even by some very worrying restaurant prices there are some amazingly brave decisions on this price list, yet there are a number of wines which were surprisingly reasonable – in so far as paying for wine in a restaurant can be reasonable.

Lastly we come to service, and sorry Urbane I cannot hold back on this. The service by some is brilliant! It really is, friendly and engaging without being nosy and they take a pride or interest, however you wish to look at it in the food and their service style to you as a customer, yet then there are others. Wow, and as I say, sorry, yet service generally falls into three categories: all staff are exceptional and well trained; all are bad and you wonder why they are there; and very seldom do you get some very good and some very bad, yet this is one of those occasions.

There are a couple I could mention, yet as he is the face many will deal with throughout the night I should make particular reference to ‘the man’ and his wines. In a nutshell, he was rude, arrogant and totally uninterested, and this seemed to be a theme that ran across the floor all night. His manner was as I say rude and completely uninterested. Maybe it was his last night (which I know it wasn’t) and he didn’t care, yet it’s pretty poor form and when many people tend to remember the negatives this is not one you care to recall.

The staff in The Euro and upstairs in The Laneway were great, especially the guys in The Laneway, and as I say some in Urbane were wonderful, yet when only half the floor is firing that night it doesn’t reflect good, and I should add when it’s so clearly obvious. I hoped this was a one-off, yet I hear from some it’s not, then all I can suggest is a rethink or a refresher for all your staff is well overdue. I think that’s all I will say about this.

So, as I said at the start I had mixed feelings about whether to make this a one line review or the god knows how many it has ended up being. Urbane is a great place to eat. You have the added bonus of a more sedate environment to have a drink of any persuasion before a more formal dinner, a wonderful dining area no matter which one you are in – upstairs or down, food that will interest you and make you wonder how they did it, and a great spot to end the night with a few drinks in a more ‘lively’ environment. So when you are wondering where to eat tonight or next week pick-up the phone and give these guys a call, you will not be disappointed and might just find yourself back again to see how the menu evolves as the Chef’s thoughts evolve.

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This review, like all restaurant reviews - unless clearly stated, is based on a visit to the particular establishment within a 4 week period of the review. This could mean it was last night, or 3 weeks ago. In an effort not to identify dinners, usually sufficient time will have passed so that hopefully any little peculiarities cannot be recalled to specific dinners, should such an event have taken place.

This review, like all reviews is not to detail the experience in depth, nor detail the menu, nor provide photographic samples of the food, location or anything else. This review, like all reviews is intended to provide some basic information from which you, the reader, can make an informed decision as to whether this establishment is suited to your dining needs and tastes.

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Restaurant Review - Esquire, Brisbane

Esquire Restaurant
145 Eagle Street, Brisbane.
http://www.esquire.net.au/
07 3220 2123
Chef: Ryan Squires

Now to the important bit, the scores. All out of 5.

Overall - 4.5. Absolutely Outstanding.

Food - 5                                                Service - 3.5
Location - 5                                           Price - 5
Wine List - 2.5                                       Access - 4.5
Confort - 4.5                                          Cleanliness - 5

Menu - Degustation Only [9 or 13 course]
Open - Lunch Tuesday to Friday & Dinner Tuesday to Saturday. Close Sunday & Monday & PH's.
Price - 13 course $130 (ex. drinks)
Dress - Smart/Smart Casual
Type - New, creative, fresh, innovative, no formal food here

It’s a difficult task to be a fresh and creative chef when so many have come before you claiming the same, and usually offering so little. However, Esquire has surely set itself apart from the rest with what can truly be called a fresh and new approach.

Sadly in a town like Brisbane which still thinks so much of the public is wanting 3 big heavy courses and cheap booze Ryan (Chef) and Cameron have stepped outside the quiet country town of the Brisbane feel and decided to take a gamble, one which I and many hope will take-off.

There are a number of restaurants in and around Brisbane which offer tastes of inventive (and not so inventive - all too much the case) degustation course, yet where Ryan differs from the rest is his confidence, at least that's what I will call it, to push the boundaries and take you for a ride, whether you wish to come or not. A review for another day: yet think Urbane, however the boat just hasn't been pushed out as far.

Esquire sits (almost) on the water’s edge of the Brisbane river with magnificent views of the Story Bridge and surrounding city scape, yet the view soon fades as the meals come out, however sometimes a little too quickly for my liking.

As I understand it, all the tables and chairs are hand made for Esquire and based on a similar style in New York, and they have this just perfect. The comfort is next to sensational and make sitting for long periods a dream.

It should also be said that the table size is truly a pleasure. While most restaurants would try and get 4 to a table Esquire keeps it to 2, which makes for an even more comfortable experience.

Table ware is at a minimum, whether this has anything to do with the environment or not I have no idea, yet its nice not to have a cluttered table.

The plates and bowls are simply stunning. They remind me of oversized river pebbles that have been moulded into the shape of a plate or bowl. I want a set for my own.

P.S. I love the open kitchen look, it’s nice to see the goings on.

The wine list is limited. This doesn’t mean it’s not good, yet with so many changes in the kitchen - after all the food design is not to design anything. To side-track, what you get with the food is what is in Chef's head that day. So the menu constantly changes and evolves as new ingredients come in (and out) of season.

Back to the wine, so with this constantly shifting "menu" there should be a wider selection of wine. So, while not a bad wine list, a broader more wider selection of wines would be a wise decision. However, I wouldn’t expect to see a wine flight anytime soon as trying to match this constantly changing "menu" would require a cellar of enormous depth and size.

Expect to find a single A4 piece of paper on the table as you sit down detailing the nights "menu". Some will be coloured in red while others in another colour. It’s simple really, the 4 in a different colour are the ones you miss out on should you go for the 9 course only - so don’t be cheap, nor think you can’t fit it in, you can, so just ask them to "feed you".

The menu will give you a hint of what is coming, yet so does an oncoming car, yet until you hit it you can only guess what is going to happen - mmm, might need to rethink that analogy.

Service? Now this is my only bone of contention. I expected in the first week service to be somewhat 'unpolished' and it was, yet as the weeks have moved on the service has 'polished' up, yet you still feel unloved. It’s not that I want kisses and hugs yet you just feel that the service, while friendly and polite is somewhat rushed, even when not busy, and this starts to rub after a while.

My other compliant about the service is the lack of, umm, knowledge or dare I suggest care from some staff when brining the dishes out. While at times it is obvious what is in front of you it would make an incredible difference if the staff took the time to explain and detail the food. For another review at another time, yet the staff here should pay a visit to Tank Restaurant and experience service I haven’t seen in a long time. Staff at Tank know the food, they explain what the concept was, how it was created and give some hints as to what it is made up of, and of course when you ask questions they have the answers. This is a wonderful experience, and one Esquire could really go with.

So, if you are looking for an amazing culinary experience, tastes to challenge both your perception of food and how it can work with others then Esquire is the place to be. With a good choice from the limited wine list, comfort and style (not over substance in this case) and food you would happily die (or live) for then drop in one night, you might just find this becoming a regular.

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This review, like all restaurant reviews - unless clearly stated, is based on a visit to the particular establishment within a 4 week period of the review. This could mean it was last night, or 3 weeks ago. In an effort not to identify dinners, usually sufficient time will have passed so that hopefully any little peculiarities cannot be recalled to specific dinners, should such an event have taken place.

This review, like all reviews is not to detail the experience in depth, nor detail the menu, nor provide photographic samples of the food, location or anything else. This review, like all reviews is intended to provide some basic information from which you, the reader, can make an informed decision as to whether this establishment is suited to your dining needs and tastes.

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Wine glasses - wonder or wank?

While on the subject of wine - for those who didn't/haven't read my first posting, it was also about wine - what is it with the whole wine 'glass' phenomena that seems to have hit the shelves (to use a term very loosely) lately? Yes, it has been around for a long time, yet there seems to be a resurgence that I just can't explain.

I think at last count, get ready for an exaggeration, Riedel had some 738 different glasses for wine. This is pretty amazing stuff. Considering the average person cant tell red from white, thinks the height of wine sophistication is spending up to $25 on a bottle (although there are some great drop's at $25) then isn't the whole "doesn't your wine deserve the best", that is the best glass to serve it in, just ... well crap?

Sure, don't get me wrong, serving a great or even half decent red in a coffee cup will somehow not really open up the wine as much as say a Riedel Vinum XL, and no I'm not on a name dropping fee for them, they just happen to be a glassware that I trust and personally use.

I know there is lots of science in the field of wine - glasses, decanters, gadgets to pour wine, storage, growth patterns, soil (terroir) etc, yet lets be honest the whole reinvention of glassware is just in the broader sense an advertising gimmick to sucker in the "home" wine snobs. I would easily bet that if I took any wine and set-up a table in the middle of a mall or market and got passers-by to try the same wine in different - yet similar - glasses they wouldn't know the difference. Of course they would not know the wine is the same, just asked to describe each wine they taste.

I'll be overly pessimistic and go for a 99.98% success rate - that is, they couldn't tell the difference.

You see, the problem with the whole wine game is that its based on the obvious. If you know the wine, or its heritage, or its background, or its maker, or its location, or its structure, or its ... well anything about that one particular wine you already have a preconceived notion of what to expect. Yes there are blind tastings etc., yet more often than not you turn up to 20 bottles of Shiraz all in front of you and you make a comment on them - knowing who they are.

Now, not to suggest otherwise, yet do you know, or can you name a single source - of notable quality - who said the 2006 Penfolds Grange was over-price cough medicine? No, well neither can I. Sure some differ, some gave it 97 out of 100 while others gave it 96, yet hey we'll let that one pass.

Wine is about the taste, the scent and how it all works on the palate. Not all, and in fact very few have a palate that can tell the difference between, as I say red and white wine, yet that doesn't mean that the level of nonsense in this business is not over blown and boarding on the corrupt - well that one is more directed at some of the critics than it is the wines.

So, back to glasses. You can argue until time stops that "glassware has been designed for specific grape DNA" yet really, who do you think buys this, and I don't mean the glasses I mean the advertising guff?

There was a brilliant story in the Australian Gourmet Traveller Wine Magazine sometime back where they interviewed a famous sommelier in Paris about his (the restaurants) cellar, the wines, his experience, his thoughts and views on being a sommelier and in charge of one of the most impressive wine cellars in a restaurant, let-a-lone anywhere in the world. And there was remark he made which has stuck with me, and one which I couldn't agree with more, and the gist of what he said was:

... that it is often very disappointing to watch people buy an extremely rare and expensive bottle of wine, and they then go through the motions of tasting, sipping, commenting, swirling it, letting it sit, letting it breath etc., and all I can think is why don't you just enjoy it ...

And its this view I agree with. So long as the conditions are right: the wine is not corked (when will they just use screw-caps only?), has been kept well, decent glassware (not coffee cups), and an appropriate respect paid to the wine's taste do you just not sit back and forget all you know (or think you know) and just drink the dam stuff and enjoy it?

Wine Tasting - Can you really taste that much?

Funny how my first posting is about wine and not food, yet while I have thought this many times, and discussed it with many I haven't really ever put my thoughts to paper - so to speak. So here goes.

Last night while sitting back and reading my latest copy of Gourmet Traveller Wine and Drinks (an Australian publication for those who don't know) I read a story by the much famed Jancis Robinson titled "Oh, the Horror!". There was just one piece that made me wonder, and that was, this being a formal occasion - a sit down dinner - the occasion probably didn't cater for the swirling and swishing of wine in the mouth and subtly (or not so) spitting into a spittoon. So, I thought to myself, here is a very knowledgable wine critic/reviewer drinking some of the best wines in the world, and I mean drinking not tasting, along with numerous plates of food (11 according to the article) along with god knows what else and so I wondered that there must be a point at which you start to lose the structure and taste of the wine. That is, you no longer have the ability on the 25th glass of wine that you had on, say the 1st.

Let my start by saying that Jancis along with others are some of the best in the business and hence their finely tuned palate can handle more wine than the average 'punter', yet even they must hit a wall when tasting/drinking wine.

So, I posed the questions to Jancis on her twitter account, and never expecting a response she said "a piece of cake", and referred to me to a tweet by another famed wine critic Neal Martin, in which he said "7 hrs tasting, 190 wines, 9500 words of tasting notes of Cru Bourgeois. Will write intro on the train home. Job done."

This got me thinking, he is trying to suggest that even a man of his skills managed to taste one wine every 2.21 minutes, for those of you: 7 (hrs) multiplied by 60 (min's) divided by 190 (wines). Now this doesn't take into account going to the toilet, writing notes, speaking to others, taking/making any calls and finally stopping for food.

So, does he seriously expect - I guess he does, us (people) to honestly believe that he can taste - meaningfully that is - 190 wines in 7hrs and provide to us (people) notes, thoughts, expectations and views that will help us in making our decisions when we next ponder over a wine list, or make a stop at the local wine store?

Personally, and get ready for a naughty word, this is just bullshit. Sorry Neal, and my apology and thoughts will mean little to you, yet this is simply bullshit. I read many times stories by (amongst many others) Nick Stock (an Australian wine critic) and James Halliday (possibly the most respected Australian wine critic) and Jeannie Cho Lee (a famous Asian MW) saying that they managed to get through 100, 110, 150+ wines in a day at a tasting showcase etc., and personally I think this is bullshit as well. All naughty words are now finished.

I am not for one second saying they did not taste these wines. What I am suggesting is that there is just an element of professional pride in claiming bigger and bigger numbers of tastings in a day.

Now it was possibly native of me to think Jancis would find it difficult to drink 20+ wines in an evening (lets assume 6hrs), with food etc., yet I think Neal's and others claims are ... as I have already said above.

Many people buy wine because they like it or want to taste it yet so often the catalyst for liking or tasting that wine was a recommendation. Now it could be one from the guy behind the counter, yet he more than likely got his initial tasting of it from one of the big critic's or a wine magazine. And so, if a critic has seriously tasted 1 wine ever 2.21 mins then it does raise a very serious question: Was the high rating and notes associated with this (or that) wine done at a time when so much wine had been tasted and so late in the day that he or she couldn't tell a red from a white anymore?

The responsibility that critics, like any critic, yet especially those in wine and to a lesser degree food have is that their recommendations come at a (often) high price. You can tell me to see a crap movie and it was $10 wasted, you can tell me this is the best wine every made and likely to be made and I could waste 000's of $'s.

Maybe the pressure to get through so much wine in a day needs to be revisited, yet all I can say in the end is, I sure hope that my wine is in the first 20 or 30 that are tasted that morning!